Yikes. I just got home from my weekend work project—you know, the kind of gig a retired Santa takes on when the sleigh’s parked and the reindeer are off-duty. (What can I say? Post-Christmas boredom is real.)

On a total whim, I decided to check the Cyberbeast’s security camera footage—because hey, paranoia loves company—and lo and behold, something did catch my eye. Some woman approached Blitzen (yes, the Cyber Sleigh), and appeared to do something near the driver’s side windshield or mirror.

Cue dramatic music and a mini heart attack.

Now, I hadn’t noticed anything wrong when I hopped in earlier, but let’s be honest—my mind was somewhere between “what’s for dinner?” and “did I leave the garage door open?” So I mustered my courage, channeled my inner sleuth, and ventured into the garage to confront the potential crime scene.

And there it was.

Nestled under the wiper blade, like a sly little treasure, was… wait for it… a $20 Ruby Tuesday gift card.

No broken glass or scratch. No ominous note. Just a surprise snack voucher from an anonymous parking lot ninja.

I stood there in dumbfounded silence, holding the card like it was some kind of golden ticket. I had braced for vandalism, but instead got mozzarella sticks and maybe a burger. What a plot twist.

To the mystery gift-giver: wherever you are, thank you for not holding some imaginary grudge against this grizzled old Santa and his shiny electric beast. Your random act of kindness did more than earn you lunch karma—it restored a little faith in humankind.

And yes, you can expect something extra sparkly under your tree this Christmas. That’s a Claus promise.

Moral of the story? Sometimes fear and suspicion pull into the driveway… but they leave with gratitude and a side of fries.

Peace on, brothers and sisters. And tip your elves.